Perfectly Proportional Puzzle Piece

This poem wasn’t easy to write. 

It was like thinking of a dirty joke 

In the middle of careers class 

And proceeding to roll on the floor laughing 

With everyone pretending not to know me.

Writing a new line was like 

Laughing even harder. 

In retrospect, 

I can only hope 

That I am now smarter. 

When we flapped our lips about nothin’.

It was like finding that long lost MacGuffin.

The one ring, the hidden jewel, 

The crystal in the cave.

Something the author dangled to make the hero behave.

The carrot on a stick, 

A classic magic trick.

She was that perfectly proportional puzzle piece.

The one lost under the couch,

The puzzle factory’s couch.

The one sold through pop music.

When I was around her, 

Two-thirds of my entire lexicon flung itself 

Back into the trash 

Leaving behind words that were trashed 

Because they clashed 

Like a redheaded stepchild in a family of blue-eyed blondes 

Or a black bishop cornered by white pawns.

Like an oil company draining the ground

My mouth opened, but out came no sound

That I could recognize. 

Some stranger renting an apartment

On the surface of your vocal cords 

And refusing to obey the landlord.

A ball filled with heart-shaped boxes,

Heart-shaped lockets, and heart-shaped chocolates 

Chained 

To your heart. 

So I did the one thing I like to say I know how to do

I quickly opened Microsoft Word 

And felt calm and assured

That I used all I learned

From reading Shakespeare’s sonnets

And the product was as bad as it was honest. 

The kind of sweet that leads to an immediate

Root canal. 

It was her birthday when I showed it to her. 

Her expression,

Like a kid discovering they’ve nothing but a 

Pair of grey socks under the Christmas tree

Or biting down on a caramel covered candy 

And tasting the bitter raisin inside.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you,” she said.

Still rings hollow.

I told her how I felt after.

We haven’t spoken since.

But I realize now as the chain loosens, 

That puzzle piece is no longer missing. 

I found it,

But it’s not supposed to be in place.

What I thought for so long would complete me

Was a perfectly proportional piece 

Of someone else’s puzzle.